Tuesday, January 17, 2012


My friend Raj was asking me why I haven't writen anything on the blog for a while... It has been hard because so much is going on. In India we were really busy with Apurva's dad being in the hospital. I could not enter the hospital and I did not go to visit him but Apurva fell sick and I had to do the day shift. First day killed me....
But then I had enough time to go over things in my head and rationalize. The next few days became a bit easy.

It seems like I'm in a phase where I'm inside myself now. Instead of emotions coming out they are staying inside and I'm trying to figure out how to live and how to move ahead and how to keep going without breaking down. This has proved to be very tiring and exhausting for sure. But much needed.

Apurva has had to be in India and that has been very hard. He was in India for a month and then came back with me and had to go back in a week because his dad's health became critical. On Jan 16, his dad passed away in the ICU. Apurva said that when they removed his ventilator it almost seemed like his dad had a smile like he had seen something.... Apurva said that during the 4 hours he sat with his dad in the room after he had passed away he had several visions of Amaey and his dad deep in conversations. He said it was so real that he cannot express himself. Amazingly, he had that same vision 4 times.

In a strange way, yes I can see Amaey and his dada deep in a conversation. The two of them were so similar, so intense, so single minded.

Farewell Ammudada. We know that Amaey and you will take care of each other.


Renata said...

I was wondering about the blog hiatus as well... So sorry to hear about Apurva's dad! BTW, very, very touching brother poem. A big hug on all of you, Renata.

Anonymous said...

So sorry that your family had to experience yet another loss. many hugs to all of you


Anonymous said...

When I heard about kaka passing away the first thing that came in my mind is he is now there to look after our loving Amu. It must be a very difficult time for all of you specially with Apu in India and Arjun and you in America and now mum and dad also gone back.Remember you are not alone. We are just a phone call away. Thinking of you all.

Lots of love and hugs.


Anonymous said...

Dear Purvi

Condolenses for your family. Really sorry that you had to face another loss.
Sending prayers your way.